Human beings can change. Through the years I have worked with people of all ages who have managed to change every thing from immediate circumstances to life long, self-defeating patterns.
The key is to first make the decision to change, then clarify obstacles and set new goals. Finally an individual must commit time and determination to take the steps required to implement lasting change.
Therapy can help. For instance, sometimes you can see the mistakes your friends are making, but they cannot see their mistakes. That is because we all have difficulty seeing ourselves clearly. Therapy helps individuals see their lives more objectively. It combines the feedback of an objective, outside perspective with the experience and support of a psychologist trained in emotions and behavior. This combination helps you to discover ways to better understand underlying difficulties so that you can map out and implement changes to improve the quality of your life.
My experience is that when you can find a therapist with expertise in the area of your difficulties and when there is also a good personal match, there are few limits on what you
Basically there are three elements to my work with you. One is that I find psychotherapy to be a very individual process, and it works best when you feel a strong personal connection with me. So you will not find me to be formal or reserved.
A second element is that I believe psychotherapy is enhanced when the techniques used in session align with your world view. In order for me to select the right techniques for you, I will want to learn more about your belief system.
Three, I subscribe to the idea that there are two different ways to help people change. One way is to assume that as individuals learn to identify and change the negative self statements they have in their mind, positive emotions and positive self talk result. This approach is usually associated with what is called behavioral or cognitive therapy.
Another way is to assume that as individuals work through and resolve negative emotional experiences from their past, positive emotions and positive self talk also result. This approach is generally known as psychodynamic therapy.
Being very pragmatic as well as eclectic, I believe both approaches work. So it becomes my job to discover which approach or combination of the two works best for you in accomplishing your goals.
When working with couples, I take the approach that responsibility for interactions is 50/50. Even when it may appear otherwise, each individual is fully responsible for his or her part in a relationship. This perspective puts you back in control of your choices and behavior. You stop simply reacting to your partner. You regain your own power, and you no longer feel helpless.